45 thoughts on “Our Daily Thread 2-6-18

  1. OK JO.

    Now your last comment from yesterday has confused me. Your actual birth date is Feb. 8th correct, and that’s the day you celebrate it? You mentioned the 7th as well, so hence my confusion.

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  2. My birthday is February 8th. However when I am in PNG I am a day ahead of you all. Therefore, when it is my birthday here, it is February 7th there. Thus allowing my son and I to have our birthdays on the same day.
    It has to do with that mysterious dateline out in the middle of the Pacific.

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  3. Your birthday occurs in whatever time zone you were born.
    As for Cheryl’s question about who names grandparents, it’s the youngest grandchild.
    Becky named Elvera “Nana” because she heard Chuck say “Mama” and “Nana” was her best.
    That has been her name since then.
    I also have a name but it isn’t getting out.
    For this reason:

    A few years ago, I got a call from Becky’s husband. He was in ail in Mexico and desperately needed me to wire some money.
    Sounded just like Brian and the story was feasible. Problem was:
    He said “Grandpa, …….”
    None of them ever called me that. If he knew my handle with the grandkids, it would have worked.

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  4. I told Cheryl that last night only it didn’t post.
    My brain refused to shut down last night. I thought of funny stories to tell Leslie, like how ultimately she is responsible for the unique scare in the middle of my right thumb. Then I prayed she would go peacefully without any pain. My thoughts jumped all over.
    I think I felll asleep a little after midnight.
    It’s another long day. While I am not physically tired I am tired in other ways. Of course I can’t whine. I don’t have cancer. I am able to get in my car, go and do what needs to be done.

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  5. I only knew one set of grandparents (maternal), and only saw my paternal grandmother a few times, since she lived in Puerto Rico.

    Our grandchildren call us Grampa (who pronounces the ‘nd’ in grandpa, anyway?) and gramma, and the other set Papa (pronounced as pawpaw) and Mimi.

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  6. Morning and Happy Birthday Ann!!! 🎂
    That photo up there is very somber….yet comforting….. 🌙
    My three CO grandkids call me “Genny”….it was supposed to come out Granny but when my oldest granddaughter Grace tried to say it…well it came out Genny….it stuck.
    To the other four grandkids living not in CO I am Grandma.

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  7. I reconsidered telling my name because with Iphone, I can tell where everyone that matters is at all times.
    They call me “Da” because Becky couldn’t say Dad, which is what Chuck calls me.
    So. To all of them I am “Da”.
    We are Nana and Da.

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  8. My dogs call me “woof” and the cat calls me “meeeeowwwww”

    Cowboy (I think) is having accidents overnight again this week, this was the 2nd morning I got up to do cleanup. Strange because I didn’t go to bed until maybe 10:45 and I made sure to let the dogs out right before that. And then I even got up at 2 a.m. to let Cowboy out again (Tess wasn’t interested). But by the time I was up at 6:30 a.m., another mess. Out come the dog pads and plastic again, I guess. At least they leave the wood floors alone and just hit the old yucky linoleum near the back door. But the meds that Cowboy is on for incontinence do cause diarrhea, unfortunately.

    It’s all the coyotes’ fault. I remember back in the day when I could leave the doggie door open most of the night without a worry.

    I’m feeling exhausted these days, too much weighing on us at work, still things I’m trying to take care of at home, waiting now for the electrician to call back and for the replica windows to come so we can replace the ones that are broken & covered in cardboard …

    And now the gardener is here, a day later than usual. He normally comes on Mondays.

    At least I have a fun story to work on today, about a scheme to start a ferry service between Malibu, Santa Monica and our peninsula to the south as one way to get some traffic relief around here.

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  9. I’ve somehow lost my sheriff’s press pass and the key card that gets us into the newsroom & allows us to use the locked printer. I’ve looked everywhere, last time I had them would have been Thursday — when I came to work Friday morning last week, no cards (they’re both on a long cord and I keep them in a slot in my bag). When I got to work Friday morning, I reached in to grab them and they weren’t there. Seems like I’ve looked everywhere …

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  10. I know a couple of families where the grandchild has “named” the grandparent, at least for that particular grandchild. When I was 10 or 11, a family moved in next door with their four-year-old granddaughter. She called them “Bampa” and Mamah” (the first syllable rhymes with Baa, the second just “ma”). They didn’t like those names, or at least the grandmother didn’t, and I thought well, if you don’t like them, and she is now old enough to say them correctly, why not tell her, “You’re a big girl now, and you can say ‘Grandpa’ now”? (They never told that child “no” about anything, though, so they were more inclined to tolerate it.)

    I’m OK with grandparents keeping the name if they happen to like it, but overall I see the biblical pattern is that those in authority are the ones who do the naming, not vice versa. I think I’d be inclined to have them try again when they are old enough to get it right, unless it’s just something like a natural change in pronunciation (like, say, I have the kids call me Mama C and it ends up being something more like “Mamacy” or “Mahcy,” and I’m OK with it).

    I have a friend whose daughter-in-law (already pregnant on marriage) told her that she was not to call herself anything to the child, but it would be up to the child to choose a name for her. That is exactly backward, and while I might be inclined with other petty things to “choose your battles,” if someone told me that I would remind her that naming is the adult’s prerogative, and that I won’t simply go nameless. I’d probably tell her, “I’m going to call myself Grandma, though obviously that might end up changing at some point, but I’m not going to be nameless in the meantime. If the child calls me something else, it may or may not be something I accept. I’m from the old school, where adults name children and children don’t name adults, though I’m OK with it if a kid comes up with some nickname that works.”

    That’s different from choosing to accept a term used in affection; I don’t think that’s wrong. But I don’t think one leaves it to the child to decide. Also, in a large family that really just wouldn’t happen, unless the grandparents accept it and refer to themselves that way. Mom said we little ones didn’t call them “Mama” and “Daddy” really at all, because our older siblings already called them “Mom” and “Dad.” (My brothers were 7 to 14 when I was born.) So, one family of grandkids is calling you “Peepaw” but the others are calling you “Grandpa,” and you refer to yourself as Grandpa, probably the family calling you “Peepaw” is going to follow suit. If you call yourself Peepaw to them, of course they will continue to do so, so it really is based on whether or not you like it.

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  11. Good morning, registration has been going very well today. Three of our camps sold out in the first 2 hours! It’s been busy, but right now there is a lull and I have time to say ‘hi’.

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  12. I respectfully disagree with you Cheryl. Parents need to be strict and deliver to the world functioning adults. Grandparents have already fought that battle with their own children. Grandparents and grandchildren have a common enemy and I fully intend to work on that.
    When BG has a child and it spends the night with me, we are having ice cream for breakfast, “It has milk in it”. We are going to paint our toes the brightest of colors, but first I am going to practice on MDH when she gets here. I can’t wait for her to call Mr. P something other than Grandpa. He is adamant about being grandpa but I think he will cave to being called Poppy, Boppy, or Howdy Doody if that is what she says.

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  13. Kim, I am not saying it is wrong to accept the grandchild-given name. It isn’t. And I definitely think that grandparents can do some things with grandkids that parents themselves would not, the ice cream for breakfast idea . . . provided that the child does in fact really have structure at home. (For a child who does not, I think that having a safe, structured environment at Grandma’s would probably be more loving. Really, the structure is in place first in any home, and grandparents choose which aspects of that structure to “waive.”)

    But for all the fun grandparents can provide, they also should be treated with respect. Children name their pets and their dolls and stuffed toys, but they don’t name their parents, teachers, etc. Adam named the animals as a sign of his authority over them, and likewise with parents naming their children. An affectionate nickname (one the other person accepts) is a different matter. If a child can’t say the name of their older sibling and the result is a butchered nickname that the family uses sometimes (or even all the time) there is nothing wrong with that. If the classroom’s children can’t handle some complicated last name and they call their teacher Mrs. G, people understand that. But that is different from deciding that this child will determine the name. The schoolchildren don’t just decide Mrs. Googlycosica will answer to “Missum” and she has to do so. If it is said with affection and respect and she likes it, sure, but otherwise she has every right to say, “No, you may use my name or call me Mrs. G, but you may not call me anything else.”

    I accepted Cheryl from the girls because there were really no other good options unless they came up with one. (I came up with calling our stepfather “Pop.”) But I have never particularly liked it that they call me Cheryl and have wished there were a better option. Actually they didn’t call me anything at all for about the first year, they would just speak to me. They naturally wouldn’t call me Mom, since that name already has a person, “Mother” is too formal and “Mama” wouldn’t work, and “Miss Cheryl” or “Aunt Cheryl” don’t work. But if we come up with a name for the grandchildren other than “Grandma” or similar ones, it’s likely to be one the parents call me too, and then our other daughter might too. I don’t like “Meemaw” and we’re not in the south anyway. But I wouldn’t want the grandchild to come up with some random name that isn’t my name and then have the girls calling me that too–even if I were otherwise OK with the grandchild doing the naming. It needs to be either a “family name” (like Mama) or a variation of Cheryl.

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  14. I am SO glad my parents didn’t perpetuate little ones’ names for people. Otherwise I might still be called my toddler sister’s name from me, Gozzie.

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  15. Jo’s clock is 15 hours ahead of us in the Eastern US, so she could start celebrating her Thursday birthday when it’s 9:00 am EST Wednesday. Get your party hats ready!

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  16. Kevin, my little sister called me “Boa.” I don’t remember it and no one knows where she came up with it. It wasn’t encouraged and I too am glad. No one has ever really shortened my name, since my mom didn’t like “Sherry” and I don’t like “Cher.” My mom said that she hesitated to name me Cheryl because she was afraid people would call me Sherry, and friends reassured her that they know people named Cheryl who always get called that. I felt that out of respect to my mom, I really couldn’t go by Sherry. And “Cher” means the actress to me.

    But none of my siblings ever had nicknames. We all go by our full names (though one is named a name that is often a shortened form of another name, but isn’t in his case), except one who goes by the shortened form of his name–but he always does so, even on legal papers, so it isn’t really a nickname at all. I always liked endearments, sweetie and honey and the like, but in our family we pretty much didn’t mess with our names themselves.

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  17. Kim, as to being there for the birth. The baby is due in April. Last baby, I was able to attend because I was able to leave then fifteen year old alone at the house and husband and his sister took the younger two to eldest son’s wedding in Colorado and other fifteen stayed with friends of ours here in town so he could go to school. Due to previous allegations, we are unwilling to leave any of them alone with husband.

    The friends who had son before continue to age (including heart attacks) and are no longer willing to do that. Others who have offered in the past, is there any way we can help?, refuse to take daughter for any length of time. Is that surprising? If there is a male in the house, nobody wants to have those allegations made, and if it is an all female house, nobody wants sixteen year old son stealing their underwear. There are no paid facilities available to them.

    It has amazed us how many people have come forward since our allegations to tell us they had experienced the same thing and no longer allow for any alone time with daughters or granddaughters or friends daughters. Girls no longer get to go down to the barn with dad to feed the stock. Not that all of those dads have been accused but enough have that they want nothing to do with it. It is a sad loss to our society. I have some of my most precious memories of times with my dad. He and my brothers and I went backpacking for a week every summer. He used to take us out to the woods where he worked and we had the freedom of the mountains. No more. Sad.

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  18. “lol:
    There is a commercial on the radio with a man saying real fast:
    “This product does not treat, cure or prevent any disease.”
    I don’t remember what it says it does.

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  19. Mumsee, are you talking about adopted or stepdaughters rather than biological ones?

    Years and years ago, Child Evangelism Fellowship training I believe (which would make it 1986), I was in a training group in which we were told that culturally it was acceptable for women to hug girls, but where they basically encouraged no other adult-to-child touch (men couldn’t touch any child and women shouldn’t touch boys), and I thought wow is that sad! Then I volunteered with a tutoring/after-school agency in Nashville, where we had the children something like three hours every afternoon (I did one day a week), and they had a very strict no-children-on-laps policy. One college-age volunteer had a six-year-old girl sitting on her lap and braiding her hair, a completely innocent activity–but one that is too dangerous in today’s culture and it was strictly against the rules, so I called the leaders’ attention to it.

    To be honest, I don’t know daycare gets away with much of anything, except that like abortion we see it as an essential part of a well-ordered society. But there is something wrong with allowing one person to have full, mostly unobserved access for hours and hours in a room full of toddlers, including bathroom help, while adults in a room with multiple adults aren’t supposed to touch children. It seems to me that daycare settings are lawsuits waiting to happen, and quite apart from my thinking them an appalling way to care for children, I would not dare put myself in that risky a situation, where you might get accused, and fired, and even prosecuted for something you did not do.

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  20. I never knew grandparenting was so complex. I suspect my own grandparents, having come from another era and the Midwest, wouldn’t have realized it either.

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  21. Cheryl, I have already anointed you with your Grandmother name. You shall from this day forward be CeCe. I know several people whose Charlene, Cheryl, etc grandmothers are CeCe. I think it is a wonderful way to shorten your name and the daughters won’t feel awkward calling you CeCe.
    I may even send you a pillow that says Pop and CeCe’s House. Spoiled, Rotten Children Welcome!

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  22. I am known by Kim, Kimberley, Kemper, Kimmer, and most hated of all Berley.
    I have been known to answer to Tim because I grew up across the street from a handicapped man who couldn’t say my name.
    More than once I have been referred to as “that little Black girl” which at a certain time in my childhood caused people to stare and try to figure out who my “other” parent was.
    Grandchildren call me Mimi. As I said, I wish I had thought of GrandDee.

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  23. My youngest daughter has a Spanish name that is four syllables and hard to pronounce until you learn it. Oldest granddaughter called her “Aunt Sah” (-sa being the last syllable of her name). It stuck and she doesn’t mind, so when speaking to the grandchildren we all say “Aunt Sah”. The oldest is now 8 and could say the name if she tried, but why bother when she has toddler siblings who couldn’t pronounce it?

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  24. Peter, I think “Elvera” is a Spanish name. Is that so?

    A wild guess is that it means “The Truth: in some language.

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  25. We’ve been trying to go to a new start up Bible study in a nearby town. The first evening (time of prayer for the local community) husband and I were not feeling well, the next time husband was away and it was terribly cold with strong winds causing the roads to drift in so it was cancelled. Tonight, even thought the pastor and his wife couldn’t make it, we were going to get together for coffee and a time of fellowship and the host’s pipe broke, leaving them with no toilet and a slight flood. I keep wondering what God has in store for this little group…

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  26. We had grandparents called Grandma and Grandpa with their last name attached to distinguish which side of the family they represented. As a child, I thought that was how all families did it except for a friend who had a Granny. With our son, he called my mother Grandmommy which later changed to Grandmom, and on the other side he had his Grandnana.My friend Karen’s mother is called Emma which is nice.

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