58 thoughts on “Our Daily Thread 5-28-19

  1. Morning! It is downright chilly this morning and is to be even colder tomorrow. That little birdie up there would be all puffed out trying to keep warm if he were here in CO! Is that a wren? He sure is cute!

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  2. Good morning one and all. A beautiful spring morning here. Birds are singing, sun is shining.

    I was just sitting here trying to figure how much damage daughter did yesterday as far as financially. Window, screens, smart phone. These things add up. But I suppose it comes with the territory. And she will have no concept of paying for it, though I will put her to work.

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  3. Hello, all.

    The other day, Mrs L and I went for a walk on a trail the local medical center has. We didn’t talk much, but just walked and listened. Lots of birds of various kinds were singing in the trees and fields around the trail. I got to thinking of the others we see on the trail with their ear buds and music playing while they walk or jog. Pity. They go out to exercise in nature but don’t enjoy it.

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  4. That’s what I said this morning. We were waiting for the horses to come onto the track and I commented it was my favorite time of day at home. All the world is quiet. You can enjoy the sound of each critter as it greets the day.

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  5. Peter, you make a good point.
    I am cooped up inside most days. Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I spent as much time outside as I possibly could. It restores me. I looked forward to coming to work today.
    I finished Where the Crawdads Sing, then I finished up a series from long ago. This was the last book which was recently written and finished the story. Yesterday I started reading the first book of a two book series that I have read multiple times. I know the story, but the pleasure is in the words.
    Cardinal Update: Mr. P caught the Mama and Papa birds feeding their young. He isn’t quite as worried about them as he was. He also reports that it looks like the 3 babies are getting their feathers. He is a born nurturer, he just grew up in the city where he didn’t get much exposure to nature.

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  6. Husband and I have a difference of opinion. He likes to sit outside with the music blaring. I like to hear the birds and insects He is generally inside while I spend quite a bit more time outside. But inside he does not do as much music as he would like outside. He likes to hear the birds and insects…..

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  7. I thought the same thing, Peter, while touring UC Santa Barbara years ago. It was a gorgeous Santa Barbara day, you could almost smell the ocean, skies blue, temperature lovely, and ever machine facing the windows inside the gym was full of kids “working out.”

    I commented at the time, “why would you run on a machine when you could be out in this weather?”

    Who knows?

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  8. Good morning! I hear the birds and the buzz of a small airplane from the smaller airport by where I grew up. Now I hear a jet up higher and a car going down the street. The birds are the background for the other noise. I also hear a distant buzz saw. Wesley likes to play music in the house, either jazz or classical, but he does not have it on yet.

    Last night we watched The Red Turtle movie. It is animated and has no words. It is beautifully done and gives the mind a workout with its complexity of deep story mixed with simplicity of setting and lack of words.

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  9. When I was walking in circles (for exercise, walking the perimeter of the larger dog park we once had in the mornings before work) I liked listening to music. It helped.

    But when I walk the dogs these days — usually after dark through our neighborhood — I need to have eyes and ears attuned.

    I also stood out in the backyard for a while yesterday at around dusk, just watching and listening to all the birds, all making different sounds. I have several very large, full trees and suspect there are nests that are quite active from the sounds of it.

    Walking on the cliffs near the ocean I prefer the sounds of the surf crashing below and the various harbor horns that moan. Sometimes I can hear the sea lions barking at night from my house, the sound seems to travel up the hill from the harbor.

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  10. Yesterday I was walking around the back of the house near the water heater and noticed a large, metal pipe/vent lying on the ground that apparently had flown down from the roof during our wind storms.

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  11. We are still having record breaking or near record heat. It is a dry heat so is not horrid like our typical humid heat. And we have a breeze, too. We feel blessed in comparison to other areas. So sad about all that flooding.

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  12. Well if the birds had more of a rhythm and beat I am certain the joggers would remove their ear buds 😂 When I am just walking/hiking and enjoying the day I never listen to other music than that of the birds….but if I am out for a run I put on the music so that I maintain a cadence with my run. Same thing with my work out on the elliptical…and I only get on that thing if the weather is uncooperative 🏃‍♀️ ⛄️

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  13. We’ve been blessed with cool and pleasant temperatures this May, a month that sometimes can see some bursts of uncomfortable heat.

    I bought a patio thermometer yesterday at the gardening shop. it was 50 this morning when I got up at around 6:30, temps will go up to 65 today.

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  14. Mumsee, when I ride the bike trail that runs through the woods and along a stream, I enjoy the sounds of nature. Hubby, on the other hand, always listens to “his” music, which is mostly ’70s rock. He says it helps set his pace.

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  15. Chas – Yesterday you mentioned boys and forts. The friend that The Boy has been playing with, and made the fort with, is a girl, Gabby. 🙂

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  16. Karen, that is good.
    The thing is, he needs to do boy things.
    I’m sensitive about this because I knew a man years ago. We still correspond occasionally on the computer
    But
    He was raised by two women. (mother and grandmother) He was a real man, and such. But he lacked some of the minute differences that men grow up with.
    It didn’t ruin his life, but some things were just different for him for a while.
    He is married now and has a family, all presumably grown now.

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  17. Nightingale is a great mom for a boy to have, as she wants and encourages him to do typical boy stuff like play in the dirt and climb trees and build forts and whatnot. As you know, she has him involved in Scouts, and in one sport or another throughout the year. They go camping a few times every year.

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  18. The boy/girl thing: It was interesting watching 2 yr old granddaughter and 1 yr old son. We had an array of toys out. GD gravitated toward stuffed animals and books.. GS gravitated toward cars and balls. Outside, they both enjoyed playing in the dirt and picking flowers (dandelions).

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  19. Chas@11:48: Raised by mother and grandmother? Was his name Timothy?

    The tendency to stereotype little boys liking to play with cars and little girls liking to play with dolls actually feeds into the whole transgender argument. Parents have decided their boy might be a girl because he played with dolls or dressed in pink. Men dressed in pink all the time in West Africa and they would have left anyone for dead who questioned their masculinity for doing so – in fact, Victorian parents dressed their young sons in pink because pink was a shade of red and red was a masculine colour (women who wore red were considered immoral). I have a niece who never played with her dolls, preferring model trains, monster trucks, and robots. I have a nephew who wanted, and has a baby doll. My niece has an ambition to marry and give birth to children, and my nephew has an ambition to be a husband and father children (and grow a beard). Do you know how damaging it would have been to insinuate my niece was acting masculine by playing with cars or that my nephew was acting feminine by wanting a baby doll?

    I have seen ultra-conservative Christian families actually question the sexuality of a son or daughter who acts in non-stereotypical ways. My sister was a nanny for such a family (members of ATI) and she was horrified when the more macho sons would sometimes joke that the more gentle and sensitive sons were gay. I will simply say that the family has horrible issues. I overheard a father speaking on the radio about his son, who took figureskating and was bullied by his male classmates who said he was gay because of his sport. He eventually decided he was gay and then committed suicide. Deciding that activities are essentially male or female when they are not can destroy lives.

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  20. Deciding that somebody was saying something profound when they were simply reporting an anecdote is amusing.

    For what it is worth, I did not play with dolls either. Or cars. Mostly just played army and threw rocks at each other.

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  21. However, if I had had friends who played with dolls, I might have done so. As it was, I had brothers and I do not fit in with women, at all. Nor do I fit in with men. Which is why I am a hermit.

    I have a daughter in law who only had a sister. They are very girlie. (that is a sexist comment, in case anybody wondered) and I have a daughter in law who had mostly sisters and a brother, she is more of a tomboy though she girlie’s up. She gets along better with males than females. I have cousins who had only sisters, they are quite girlie. I have cousins with a mix and they are girlie but can get in the dirt and have fun.

    I suspect Chas is correct. We need a mom and a dad. Timothy had a Greek dad and we don’t know if he was dead or alive. He also was Paul’s “child of the faith” so clearly spent time with Paul.

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  22. What I observed is a proposed explanation for the study that Kizzie shared. The study apparently observed that brain patterns of those who claimed to be the opposite sex resembled the patterns of those who were the sex they claimed to be. Leaving aside thorny questions of statistical analysis, of which there are none in the link, a simple explanation would be that the difference in brain patterns relates to personal interests and foci. Thus perceived differences on those patterns are based on stereotypical beliefs that women always are interested and focused on A and C, while men are always interested and focused on B and D. The flaw in the argument is that male and female humans are both human, and thus their interests and foci often overlap. The human range of experience is far broader than stereotypes based in culture.

    As with other current cultural debates, both sides are making the same argument, that behaviours and characteristics culturally associated with male or female roles are what makes a person a man or a woman. The conservative side insists that men have certain characteristics and behaviours and women have certain characteristics and behaviours. The transgender side agrees with that argument, saying that a male who exhibits characteristics and behaviours associated with women must be a woman and a female who exhibits characteristics and behaviours associated with men must be a man.

    While sexual and reproductive roles are different, men and women have more in common than society, conservative or progressive wants to admit. Adam’s fall affected both his male and female descendants equally, while Christ’s salvation is available equally to men and women. Both Adam and Christ in his human form, were male, yet their actions affected both males and females, demonstrating that men and women are not inherently different species (as my sociologist professor once said in a Freudian slip before she corrected herself – a rather telling betrayal of the mindset behind transgenderism, which is what she was speaking about), but rather the inseperable parts of the final act of Creation which was made in the image of God. As Paul said in I Corinthians 11:11-12: “In the Lord, however, woman is not independent of man, and man is not independent of woman. For just as woman came from man, so man comes through woman, and all things come from God.”

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  23. I don’t know nothing about no brain patterns.
    I do know that I taught Chuck to drive. Elvera couldn’t have done it.
    My sister never had a sister and always wanted one.
    That’s all I know for sure.

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  24. Mumsee and I would have been great fort friends.

    I actually think kids, under the age of say 11 or so, are pretty much into many of the same activities, especially in the outdoors. My girlfriends and I all played baseball, football, Olympics, Tom Sawyer and a whole variety of western themed game scenarios “as seen on TV” that involved much dirt and falling down. 🙂

    When they begin to move into adolescence is when I think boys and girls tend to go their separate ways. But as kids, well, they’re just kids doing what kids do.
    ___________________________

    Good news on the Carol front. I’d sent an email over the long weekend to the facility and to the attn of Lucy, one of the owners whom I’ve met, asking about helping me arrange to get Carol’s hair cut there. I just talked to Lucy who said she already was in the process of arranging an in-house haircut for Carol this week, the wheels were in motion. Whew. She said it’s safer than trying to take her out at this stage and I heartily agreed.

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  25. Doesn’t mean there aren’t more girlier-girls than I and my friends were, but there seemed to be a lot of rough-and-tumble girls in our neighborhood, school and scout troop.

    When the Beatles suddenly burst on the scene when we were 12, everything changed.

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  26. I remember asking my dad, who used to take me out to Dodger stadium where you could still sit in the bleachers for a pittance, whether it’s ok for (grown) women to be baseball fans. I feared I’d be forced to give it all up, this game that I loved. He said nah, lots of women baseball fans.

    As an adult, I don’t follow sports as closely as I thought I would, but I still enjoy watching a good game, whether baseball or football, as long as I have a favorite team to root for. And I still remember all the rules and strategies, though some things have changed in both games.

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  27. You can make the print on the screen larger. I know someone else mentioned one method, but the one I use it this: Hold “ctrl” and hit the “+” button until the print is large enough. I use that a lot.

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  28. Chas, that is because Elvera’s personality wasn’t the type to teach how to drive, not because she was a woman. Janice said the other day that she was the one who taught her son how to drive.

    Individual men and women have very different personalities. I have a sister who is very good at crocheting, a handicraft often classified as feminine, but we had a good friend, who is male and in the army, who also liked to crochet. I cannot crochet, as every time I try to learn, I only get so far and then forget how to do it. But I can both use a needle, thread, and sewing machine to sew clothes and use a hammer, screwdriver, and power tools to renovate a room or refinish furniture. I learned how to sew from observing my mother and how to use tools from observing my father. My father had a regular job, while my mother retired from teaching to raise her children and homeschooled us, but I have two cousins, one male and one female, whose mother worked a regular job and their father, who was on disability, homeschooled them.

    Consider the old trades before mass manufacturing killed those trades. Tailors and dressmakers both made clothes, hatmakers and milliners both made hats. Cooks and chefs both prepared food. Housekeepers and stewards both oversaw the running of houses. Weavers could be male or female. Sheets and sails both needed to be stitched, and lace and fishnets both needed to be netted. Both sexes were herders and farm labourers – in the Bible, both Rachel and Jacob, Zipporah and Moses tended flocks. In the Industrial Revolution, men and women both worked in the factories. Both men and women were domestic servants and both were slaves. The shared human experience has been far wider and far more diverse than Western culture since WWII.

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  29. I enjoyed listening to the birds here, but can do it from indoors. We have louvered windows and I usually have one open. They are hard to see though. Except for the Willy Wagtail, he is always hanging around.

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  30. Roscuro – You mentioned that the brain patterns may relate to “personal interests and foci”. I had made a similar comment, but someone replied:

    “These guys aren’t studying neural connectivity (which visibly changes in sync with habit and behavior), they’re studying the structure of the white and gray matter. Even following the links doesn’t take us to places with much information, but the known gender differences in these regards aren’t even in areas related to conscious thought. They’re in areas related to motor control and vision.”

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  31. I just answered an unknown call on my cell (I tend to do that more when I’m relying on it for work call-backs I may not recognize) and the guy says: “We talked before about your home, what’s the next project you plan to do, will it be inside or outside?”

    Almost elicited a scream from me, but I calmly told him “no project” but thanks for calling …

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  32. Kizzie, that is odd the person says it is in areas not related to conscious thought. Motor control and vision are both under voluntary control, so personal interests and foci would play a significant role in how those areas are used, and the brain is, to use a cliched phrase, a muscle. It is not actually a muscle, but it can form new connections and pathways through use in an analagous way to how muscles become thicker and stronger through exercise. The commenter seems to forget the brain is greater than the sum of its parts.

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  33. Karen, didn’t work for me. I probably did something wrong. But that isn’t the issue. How do I get “World” on the computer?

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  34. My dad tried to teach my mom to drive, an effort that ended badly when he exited the car at a stop sign and stalked home in a huff, leaving my poor mom at the wheel.

    She signed up for driving school after that.

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  35. Yeah, culturally we have quite a long list for each sex of what they’re good at, and I think that a lot of Christians tend to think that there is morality involved. I grew up with four older brothers, my younger sister far preferred playing with our younger brother, and I didn’t really have friends. So I never really learned the rhythms of female culture, and sometimes I feel out of step in groups of women. My brain is likely wired more like a man’s–but I’m very much a woman. But by the time I was in my thirties I had come to term with the reality that every person is different, and everyone feels awkward in some settings, and that’s life.

    My husband does watercolor, which is (as far as hobby interest goes) almost totally a woman’s thing . . . but it’s mostly men who make a living at art. My husband also plays the piano some (just at home, and not very often), and I’ve heard people naively refer to piano playing as feminine. But again, many of the people who make a living at it are men. Poetry too is deemed “feminine” in our culture. But what do we do with Shakespeare and the many, many well known male poets?

    In general men are more competitive than women, and in general women are relational in a different way than men are. In general respect means more to men, and love means more to women. Studies on toddlers show that their verbalization patterns are very different (nearly all words for girls, mostly noises for boys), and patterns of play are often very different–not because parents encourage it, because many parents have been surprised to find how different their little boys and little girls play. And some of these differences are important cultural differences. I wouldn’t send my little boy to school in a pink dress no matter how much he begged–pink dresses simply aren’t male attire in our culture, and there really is a “line” of what is proper. But if a boy’s favorite color is pink, it isn’t a moral dilemma or a sign there is something wrong with him. If one boy likes football and one likes poetry, both are within a normal human range.

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  36. Thanks again, Phos.
    Specifically, I was interested in the article on dementia.
    You may remember that my wife has dementia. I am caring for her now. I hope I can continue to do so.
    She still has her sweet personality. One of my main problems is getting her to eat and drink. Sometimes I feed her like a baby. Other times, she appears to be eating, but suddenly spits out a mouthful she has been eating, but not swallowing. That is the most exasperating. Mostly, she sits in “the big chair” and watches FoxNews. We went out and sat on the deck about an hour this afternoon.

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  37. I have a friend who says girls who grow up with brothers have less hurt feelings as adults than those who only have sisters. He reports that he can ruin his wife’s day by asking what she did to her hair. He has observed those with brothers who can take good natured teasing about appearance without taking any offence.

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  38. I agree with Cheryl. I had an elderly friend who had ranched and rodeoed all of her life. She would say didn’t know about woman’s work and man’s work, there is just work, and it has to be done.

    A couple of funny gender stories on my son……He had a throwing gene in him. I had 3 girls that I raised that did not, so I guess it came from being a boy. He would throw anything. We had to redirect that into only throwing balls, and had all sorts of soft, nerf type balls for him to throw and catch. Tha lasted until he was about 3.

    As soon as he learned his colors, he would always say that his favorite color was pink. We never tried to steer him away from that, as pink is a pretty color. When he was almost six, we went for a checkup at the Dr. She had an intern training, who happened to be a very pretty young woman. When they were doing his cognitive assessment, one of the questions was what is your favorite color. I was expecting pink, but he said in his deepest voice -“brown”. It made me laugh. I assure you he notices every pretty girl.I am not looking forward to him trying to impress them in his teen years.

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  39. rkessler, that is what I was thinking. There are differences and they are huge and they are not about playing with cars and dolls. Or who is a seamstress and who is a tailor. It is back to what Chas said, a boy learns things from men he can’t learn from women. Girls learn things from women they can’t learn from men. Yes, a man can discuss periods with his daughter but that is not what I am talking about. And a boy can learn things from a woman and girls can learn things from men, but there are things that only really come from one or the other.

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  40. My daughter has no problems working around macho EMTs because she grew up with three older brothers.

    I remember when she was in junior high, girlfriends were over and they were twittering and giggling over some of the boys at school.

    CR looked down her noses at them, “They’re just guys. What’s the big deal?”

    She can be very feminine, but she doesn’t any guff from men–which makes us thankful.

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  41. I think I get along better with women because of the boys at school who teased me to the point of verbal bullying because I wasn’t athletic enough. At least, I think that’s what it was. I tried my best and loved to play sports, but lacked some of the coordination. But when it came to running, I could run farther than most of them. I guess that’s why I did decently at the mile in high school, though I never won a race. Got 3rd a few times.

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  42. In my late single days, I once attended a church event at someone’s home. In the middle of the event, I looked around the living room and realized all the women but me had moved into the kitchen. Then I saw with relief that one other woman had stayed to talk in the living room (her husband was also there). A few minutes later, she and her husband left, and I knew I needed to move into the kitchen, too, but I was disappointed.

    I am pretty sure that in my family, we didn’t customarily separate women in one room, men in another. We participated with what we wanted to participate with. And since we were 75% male, and I had both older and younger male siblings (only one of whom participated in sports), I was comfortable interacting with guys. BUT we didn’t have a TV till I was a teenager and all of those older brothers were out of the home, and only one brother participated in sports (and I only vaguely knew he did), I didn’t really get the stereotypical guy stuff from my brothers. They weren’t always talking sports, or playing violent video games, or any of that stuff.

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