69 thoughts on “Our Daily Thread 3-30-17

  1. Kizzie, You might try Dave Ramsey’s “Every Dollar” application. It’s a free budgeting tool that is supposed to be very easy to use (I haven’t tried it). You can download it from his website. It is used to budget for the upcoming month so (as he says) you can tell your money where to go instead of seeing where it went. Just a thought.

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  2. Finally figured out why I didn’t have internet for the last several hours. I had to reboot my wireless router, instead of just the computer. When nothing worked, I sat here thinking and trying to remember what someone told me to do last time. When I finally remembered, it worked.

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  3. Ah, Jo. I admire people who can do things like reboot routers (or even think to do it). I would have been sitting there crying and frustrated, forlorn that once again, technology had defeated me. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

    Brava!

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  4. I was getting dressed to go to the gym this morning (Back on schedule, I’ve been 8 of the last 10 days), when my ribs said, “Hello. Remember us?”

    I feel like a cheat, but I’m walking at 8, so even though I’m up and able, I’m going to give them four days off. Why live in pain?

    The weather is gorgeous. We may work in the yard this weekend and get the garden set up and everything else cleaned up and neat. That will stretch them ribs!

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  5. Good morning, all, from yellow tinged Atlanta. I slept with the windows open all night despite the pollen. I need to crank up the fans real soon. The temp upstairs last night was close to 80.

    I have a lot of cooking I need to do today. Do you do any big batch cooking to last for awhile or be frozen? I knew a lady whose husband did not want any leftovers. I thought that was cruel and unusual punishment.

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  6. That’s the big thing here Janice. A group of women get together with a “chef” and have a party where they leave with 6 freezer meals and instructions of what to do. My friend M has a restaurant background and has been hosting some of them. For one she made my white lasagna.
    I did not exercise this morning. I overslept. I took Amos in to the groomer’s and on my way home passed a group of women who were just starting Yoga in the Park. Oh to live the life of leisure, but I have messed up twice now and married for love not money. ๐Ÿ˜‰
    I also managed to sneak some Goodwill donations out of the house before the resident pack rat caught me. If he had seen the nice wooden hangers I donated….well, you just can’t find hangers like that anymore! Currently I have half a roll of the flexible plastic pipe that we used for the drainage system in the back. We definitely need to hold on to that! Along with the plastic pieces that didn’t work and he didn’t save the receipt. You just never can tell when you are going to need something like that.
    His current project is to refinish a kitchen side table like piece of furniture. When the leaves are dropped down it is about 18 inches wide and 30 or so inches long. It has a door on one end so you can store things inside and then the leaves can be raised to give you more surface space. It used to be on casters but he removed them. He is so proud of himself but I seriously don’t know where we are going to put it. We have too much furniture as it is. He claims I don’t like any of his stuff. I assure him I don’t like any of my stuff either. ๐Ÿ™‚

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  7. Janice, more often that not my lunch is leftovers. I particularly like it when a dinner makes enough leftovers for two or more meals. My husband is fine with leftovers, but never more than two meals of them, and usually really just the meal and one of leftovers, while I can eat them every lunch for the next week (depending on what they are); if there happens to be anything left at that point, I throw it out. I sometimes make lots of something and freeze it in small batches.

    For a year or two now, I generally have bought chicken in large packages, about three pounds each, and when I’ve made a chicken dish I’ve thawed the whole package. I then make whatever dish I want to make but I think ahead to something else I want to make with the rest of it and I cut it up appropriately, bake it if it needs to be baked, and (occasionally) refreeze the extra portion if I won’t be making it in the next few days. I might, for instance, make chicken and dumplings but cut up chicken for stir fry and go ahead and fry it up now, with maybe a couple of pieces in the oven for an easy meal at some point. I make sure not to serve only chicken during the week, but it’s the one meat everyone in my family likes and I’m serving it several different ways, and no one has complained yet. I also put extra taco meat into the freezer once we’ve had burritos a couple of days, and then at some point I pull out two or three containers with a little bit in each one and we have enough for a meal.

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  8. Linda – Thanks. We do have some Dave Ramsey materials. I’ll ask Hubby is he knows about the Every Dollar app.

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  9. The kestrel on the fence post isn’t the best photo ever–he’s simply too far away, at the end of the range for my camera that just broke, at the back of our yard. But he’s a beautiful bird, one of my favorites. This one is a male, quite a bit more colorful than the female–the only North American raptor where the two sexes are marked differently. (In most raptor species, the female is bigger than the male but looks just like him.) Last year he and his mate both hung around for a few days, and I even saw them mating on the corner of our back fence.

    We get a lot of these around here–I’ve sometimes seen three on a trip into town and another three on the trip back home, though other times I won’t see any. The last two or three years they have hung around our yard for a couple weeks in the spring but always, maddeningly, at the very back of the yard. We have one tree he will sit on at the very tippy top of the tree, but it’s close to the back of the yard on the left side. Another tree is only about halfway back and closer to the library window, so I wish he’d someday land there and let me get some closer shots. (When I had my older camera with a shorter zoom, he sometimes did.) But regardless, he’s a truly beautiful bird and he deserved having his picture taken.

    My new camera, with yet a longer zoom, is supposed to arrive tomorrow, and maybe, just maybe, Mr. Kestrel will pose for me again but the zoom will be able to show him in sharper detail.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. Kim – When it came time to go through MIL’s things here, Hubby had me do it because he knew he would want to keep a lot of useless stuff, but that I would be able to get rid of what we didn’t need.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Yes, I make several batches at once. After cooking for six or more for so many years, it’s hard to drop to two or three. So, I make the usual amount and freeze half. Lifesaver! I’m tired of dreaming up dinner ideas after 40 years. For some reason, my husband doesn’t want a new cooking hobby. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

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  12. Funny router story. For his birthday, I bought Hubby a set of motion-detector outdoor cameras so he can spy on all of the animal activity in the yard (we live in the country and get a lot of visitors). One evening last week he spent some time configuring them and connecting them to the cloud storage. The next day, had we had no internet all day. I can tether to my phone, so it didn’t hinder my work but I did e-mail him and ask him if he’d done something to mess it up, which he thought he had. When he got home, he played with it for quite a while, gave up, and finally e-mailed our ISP to find out if there was something he needed to configure on the router so they could support the camera interface. They e-mailed back apologizing that a cable had been down all day in Philadelphia, which was why we’d had no internet.

    p.s. my Hubby would eat leftovers every day of the week and I have to be careful to throw away food that is too old to eat or else he would

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  13. I have a question, I suppose, aimed at the men. I’ve been asked in the last week to pray for maybe four young couples, some engaged, some dating, who are making poor choices about the relationships that are hurting the girls’ families.

    I’ve been making my off-ensive prayer suggestion and praying for the young men in the relationships. While I recognize that lust often plays a major role in the young men’s blind spots, I wonder if there’s something else going on. Do they not have any protective sense toward the young women? Do they really mean to let the young women call the shots in the marriages–even as they see the damage they are causing to the young women’s families?

    One girl will NOT move her courthouse marriage ahead one day, even though she knows her father cannot attend on that particular day. The mother is beside herself, trapped between daughter and husband. I’ve been praying for the groom-to-be to reason with his bride. Who knows what will happen?

    It reminds me of a story from long ago. A woman in our Bible study was distraught. Her daughter had announced she was getting married on Valentine’s Day in Lake Tahoe.

    Parents were disappointed not to have the big wedding at our church, but this was a thirty year old professional with a life of her own.

    The hitch? They wanted to focus on themselves and no one was invited. Not even their parents.

    The father was in tears. “I can’t see my baby girl married? Not walk her down the aisle?”

    No. The wedding was about themselves, no one else.

    They finally compromised. The parent sat in the hotel lobby and watched their daughter walk by in her wedding dress to her intimate wedding. They sat a few tables away in the restaurant where the couple went afterwards.

    As far as I know, the couple is still married and all is forgiven–but why would you hurt the people you love? I don’t understand to this day.

    Marriage is about a couple making a new life. Weddings are about families joining. Even the big deal fancy black tie wedding we attended on New Year’s was a family affair.We have so many Italian relatives, our side made up 2/3 of the guests. But we had watched that groom grow up. We loved the bride. We embraced her into our FAMILY.

    And the groom wrote me a note the other day telling me how wonderful it was so many of his family attended. (And then, scribbled, “Marriage is fantastic!” Which made me laugh since they’d been living together for a couple years . . . .)

    Any thoughts? Does this generation of young men and strong willed women not have any sense that marriage involves more than just them?

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  14. I woke up later than planned and feel beat. But not as beat as the driveway crew. I received an email from the dog park jerry late last night, which I didn’t see until this morning, saying the day had been “arduous” and a lesson in the fact that he’s not 21 anymore (both guys are in their 50s, I believe). He was wiped out (after also banging his head on the dumpster, making him see stars, at the end of it all). Said he got one boot off, fell back on his bed and was out like a light for a few hours before waking up to walk his dog. But he said they’d be back around the same time this morning (which would be around now).

    I’m sure he’s relayed all this to Real Estate Pal (who’s older than all of us and understands all too well that you just can’t do some of this hard manual labor after a certain point in life). I’m wondering if hiring some day laborers to come in to do some of the worst of the concrete breakup would be wise? Waiting until they get here to maybe assess some of those ideas. I’m just hoping he’s not using his vacation to do this job (he works full time somewhere, I’m pretty sure).

    The house that’s killing us all.

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  15. Cheryl, I wondered what kind of bird that was. It’s very striking and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything quite like it before. Nice. :–)

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  16. If you’re asking me, you’re asking the wrong person.
    All my granddaughters had expensive, big weddings.
    I thought it was a terrible waste of time and money.
    I told you before:
    Sixty years ago, Elvera Collins and I walked down the aisle on Sunday morning after church. Hundreds of people saw us pledge to God and each other.
    It has worked so far.
    She cost me $13.00 plus the cost of an orchid.
    Best investment I ever made.

    I’ll send Aj a picture come June.

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  17. These are mostly true although I will add to “Don’t be ugly” that sometimes you have to invoke the Almighty and tell the misbehavin’ person that “God don’t like ugly”. I am also growing weary of the “Bless you heart” thing. Sometimes bless your heart is said with true sympathy. The alternative to this phrase is “God love you”. Sometimes when dealing with a child you say “God love it little heart”. It is the equivalent of “there, there, baby. Mama will make it better, lets go rock a while”.

    http://www.southernliving.com/culture/things-southern-moms-say-to-girls

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  18. Michelle, it is hard to understand the reasoning behind not wanting to share the joy of a wedding. I had a very small wedding and mostly invited people who could conveniently get to it. Since I was paying for the wedding and dinner and did not want to spend a fortune that was one reason I invited only a few. Also, realizing the expense of traveling to a wedding, I did not want others to feel obligated to spend the money to attend my wedding.

    With all the social media these days perhaps that might be why someone wants to keep a sense of privacy about their getting married. They can share pictures with the world so easily online.

    In the past people eloped for various reasons. My first reaction is to think of selfish motivations, but if family members tend to be controlling and heavy on expectations, maybe this is best way to be able to do the wedding as they want it done.

    It is easy to make assumptions on outward appearance, but their hearts have their reasons. Do you have any way to ask them?

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  19. Expense? Privacy? Practicality?
    My father offered me $3,000 to elope. I wanted a big wedding and gifts. When it was all over he asked me if I got enough gifts to cover the expenses. No. I was also sick all day.
    The second time I married neither of us had living parents. His children were spread all over the US and the thought of standing in front of people and saying wedding vows broke me out in a cold sweat. It just seemed so invasive to something so personal. We did have a reception a week later.
    Perhaps it is family dynamics. My niece is getting married next May. We are all thrilled. We love the prospective groom and they have dated since college. She and her brother want nothing do do with their dad and his new wife. She doesn’t want them at her wedding and has already chosen to have her brother walk her down the aisle. She wanted a destination wedding but changed her mind when her Nana told her she wouldn’t come but would give her the money she would have spent on the trip. Turns out it is important to her to have her Nana there. It will be a smaller wedding near here.
    Perhaps the younger generation is taking a clue from their grandparents or great grandparents and focusing on the marriage instead of the wedding.
    Not knowing each situation, I don’t know if my answers are helpful or not.

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  20. Neither my mom nor I understood the big wedding thing. She and my dad were married quietly, in a Presbyterian manse in Minnesota, I believe, with just a few people with them.

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  21. She wore a suit ๐Ÿ™‚ very subdued and proper in the late 1940s. And she did have a notice with her photo printed in her hometown Iowa paper.

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  22. My sister debated between a big, fancy wedding and eloping. She chose the fancy wedding (she had, for instance, violinists from the best orchestra in her area) but she did it fairly inexpensively. At the time, I mainly thought that eloping wasn’t a good idea because it disappointed people who want to be there. Now I think that eloping isn’t a good idea because marriage is about more than two people.

    I once had a friend who sent me a letter with some strong complaints about her husband. I knew she sent it to several people, but when one of our professors asked me if I had gotten a copy (meaning that she herself had, and that the circle of those who received the letter was more than a few intimate friends), I figured she was sinning against her husband. (She actually had legitimate reason to be mad at him–he was making excuses year after year about why they couldn’t have children just yet, and had doubled down all the tighter after a recent miscarriage, which made her heart yearn all the more. But legitimate reason to be hurt and angry and legitimate reason to send a letter calling your husband nasty names to your 100 closest girlfriends are two different things.) I didn’t like confrontation, still don’t. But on the grounds that I had stood up with her as a witness, hearing her vows, I called her. I didn’t even mention the letter–I didn’t have to, she did. Immediately she told me that had been a foolish and reckless letter, so I didn’t have to say anything, but I was prepared to. Had she eloped, I wouldn’t have made that call. (Did I have it to do over today, I would tell her she needs to write or call everyone who received the letter and make it right, but at the time I was satisfied that her heart was back in the right place toward her husband, recognizing his sin but also seeing her own. They went on to have several children, and one day I had lunch with them and he told me how God had turned his heart toward his wife and toward having children.)

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  23. I read once, years ago, a thought that stayed with me. Marriage is not just about one couple–it’s the connection in the family tree, connecting you both directions. It matters to many generations who you marry. Thus, the couple also needs to take seriously concerns about the potential spouse raised by their parents, especially if those parents are wise and godly. Now, there’s a time to marry without the family blessing–my in-laws, for example, had both of their families telling them that this spouse wasn’t good enough for him/her, and yet they went on to almost 62 years of marriage while several siblings on both sides made shipwrecks of their own family lives. I think there might be a time when the family is so hostile, but others outside the family confirm you are deciding wisely, that the easiest way to do it is just to elope and be done with it. But that should be the minority of cases, a rare exception.

    I do think that a wedding costing tens of thousands of dollars is a waste of money, however. The wedding can be pretty and fancy–it is a big celebration–but it’s foolish to have one day cost a year’s income. For me personally, I knew I couldn’t afford to feed a meal, but I didn’t want to exclude anyone who wanted to attend. I didn’t want to have just a few guests and spend a lot of money on them, in other words. So I chose to have the invitation be broad (three churches got an invitation that anyone in the church could come) but not to serve a meal. Then knowing that most people wouldn’t travel for a wedding for someone who wasn’t family, we had a second reception in Indiana after our honeymoon. I wore my wedding dress again, and friends in Indiana and Chicago were able to come and celebrate with us.

    My mother’s first wedding was in Nigeria in a grass-roofed church. Mom wore a dress she already owned (no time to get a new one) and the only people in the congregation who spoke English were the preacher and the missionaries they had as their witnesses (a married couple). Apparently Mom had some regrets she hadn’t had a fancy wedding, so when she was marrying again years after Dad died, my sister told her she could have a “real” wedding. My sister and I were her maid of honor and matron of honor, she had a reception complete with wedding cake, etc. She wore the same dress she bought to be mother of the bride for my sister’s wedding (and it wasn’t really an appropriate “style” for either event–cream with large flowers–but it was what she wanted), but she had a church wedding with guests who understood English, and it wasn’t at all expensive. (The church ladies put together a spectacular event, with a meal with many kinds of food and a cake, for more than a hundred people, and charged her $100. Somehow not understanding how much a caterer would cost, she griped and griped–hopefully only to us–about that $100.)

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  24. I used to, in my early twenties, think my ideal wedding was a tiny service with only immediate family. Lately, my dream wedding would include as many family and friends as possible. Sometimes I find myself thinking, “(Name of friend) would really like (name of family member). Maybe they could meet at my wedding.” There is no wedding visible in my future at this point, so I just shake my head at my dreaming. I’ve realizes, when thinking of who I would invite to a wedding and whether they could come, that Christ’s wedding feast will be the only truly complete wedding celebration.

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  25. Of course, as I walked down the front steps a neighbor was walking her dog and stopped to tell me their (her son’s, I think) $14,000 horror story of underground/outdoor leaking pipe repairs.

    “It’s always something,” she said.

    The worker reinforcements already looked like they were speeding the job along when I left.

    On the difference between cats and dogs: I can always tell when workers first pull up (even though I may not hear them if they’re parking across the street). Annie makes a dash for the spare bedroom while the dogs charge out the doggie door for the anticipated greetings.

    While I would like to join Annie and hide, I force myself out behind the dogs to get to it …

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  26. Got this w/a photo from worker: separated sewer pipe approximately 24″ from exterior wall under bathroom window. A combination of roots, foundation and ground movement are all suspects.

    Then he said something about praying and keeping my fingers crossed …

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  27. The new photo: the flowers were past their prime and beginning to wilt, but this honeybee isn’t seeing a whole lot of options out there, so she stayed around. I liked the loaded pollen baskets and the way she landed on the edge of the flower and peeked in before she went in.

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  28. For today’s dinner, ten year old slow cooked some steaks, added raw carrots (his personal favorite) and dad’s zucchini bread. Well done, son. A bit heavier on the seasoning than I might have done but it was well eaten.

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  29. My day has turned out far different than anticipated. I’m just in with Stargazer from helping a friend put down her much loved dog.

    Murphy was a 16 year-old Australian shepherd. We’ve known him for 14 of those years and he was a regular houseguest (including just last week). Sad day. My friend is a widow and now the house is silent.

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  30. They say losing a pet can be hard because they are a constant in the house companion. The humans in our lives have other interests and pop in and out of our day. The pet is always there and when they aren’t it is a hole in our house.
    I am by no way equating the loss of a pet to the loss of a friend, relative, child, spouse, etc. Just acknowledging the loss of a pet leaves a different kind of hole in our lives.

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  31. That’s so hard, michelle. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ Kim said it well, pets become a “constant” (even if not always concentrated on very much). And their lives go by so quickly.

    Saw this new photo book app some of you might make use of:

    Donโ€™t have time to make photo books? We hear you.
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    It takes just 30 seconds to set up your Photo Book Seriesโ€”then the rest of the work is done for you.

    https://chatbooks.com/

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  32. Well Michelle my Mr P and I ran off and married…nary a soul knew about it…well except for my best friend and her fiancรฉ….they met us at the little white church in Indiana on a stormy summer night and witnessed our marriage…along with Rev Malcomb B Greene and his lovely wife. We did not want attention…we do not enjoy crowds and fuss…we just wanted to get away…get married and avoid all the fuss and expense….that was 1975…we are still going strong (even through retirement thus far!)…I believe my parents were relieved they did not have to pay out any money…my Mr P’s family was surprised and befuddled….but it all worked out….my dear father in law was amused and very supportive of us…. (how I loved that man!)…

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  33. Oh the wedding talk. My daughter got married with just the officiant and the photographer. Not even a pastor. I felt like the Lord wasn’t invited either. Very hard. She downloaded all her pictures to my computer the night before I left. I didn’t even want them.
    However, she did listen to me and had her sisters spend the night with her the night before. Then they came by to see me as they left town.
    Reception a week later, but she even wore a different dress.

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  34. Nancyjill (6 p.m.), I think that was always my mom’s feeling, she just didn’t want to be in the middle of all that attention, it would have been way too stressful for her.

    OK, pavers ordered, being delivered Monday morning (per guy in charge of the work who said they’re still working on excavating that pipe this afternoon). Pavers — in cream, brown & charcoal, 2 different sizes that interlock into patterns — look sufficiently beat up (“tumbled,” they call that in the industry) for my taste. ๐Ÿ™‚

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  35. Sometimes we have a lot of leftovers. Mrs. L still likes to cook for more than two people. Usually it’s from the weekly Sunday potluck.

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  36. Adding to my wedding comments: I think part of their decision was that his family is in the Midwest and they didn’t want them to have the expense of coming. Also there is the awkwardness of having divorced parents and how to handle that. Everyone was included in the reception and they even bought sweet dresses for the nieces.

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  37. We eat leftovers a lot, but we also like leftovers, so that’s good. Early last week, I cooked off a large package of chicken Hubby had bought, & we had chicken all week.

    Weddings. I’ve heard of divorced couples with a child marrying, & one of them will insist they won’t attend if the other parent is invited. How selfish & petty.

    My SIL went to a wedding where the groom’s mother wore black as a statement of her displeasure with the bride.

    A family member had a pretty ritzy wedding with the kind of professional photographer who photographed them in various poses & ways that looked like a magazine layout. Gorgeous pictures (the bride was gorgeous herself), but I don’t know if there were any photos of the other guests or family members. Made me think how self-centered the wedding was.

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  38. My family loves leftovers, usually remaining potatoes, vegetables, and meat, as my mother cooks her special meals with those ingredients. We combine them in the large cast iron frying pan to reheat and call it ‘horrible hash’, to disguise the fact that it tastes delicious to outsiders. My nieces and nephews are reluctant to eat it – one hates any form of combined flavours and texture, so that is not surprising, but I’m inclined to think the others were deceived initially by the name and lack the courage to try it for themselves.

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  39. The bridge is probably about 6 miles from where we live. I don’t know any details, but it sure sounds bad. I am glad we don’t go into work that way. It will probably mean we will get more traffic on our commutes. I am thinking an early, early start and a late, late finish will mean less time on the road. Of course we could just spend the night at the office.

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  40. They were saying it is heavily used so not having it for the “foreseeable future” will make everything much worse on other highways.

    Last-minute plumbing hiccup which means no bathroom for me all night. Great. Hoping the neighbors will let me dash over to use theirs again.

    Score one for the (laughing) house.

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  41. At 10 p.m. It is 76 degrees here and that is after a little on and off rain. It is too warm again which can mean another storm. Not good for traffic while the bridge is out. I am thinking they may need to stagger work hours for major employers downtown. I need to watch the news. I have not had it on since this has happened.

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  42. We had to get both of our cars jumped today. Well, one has needed it for a while, but we had to take the main car to the mechanic and it was time to jump the other one. Son-in-law to the rescue! (I could just imagine his car telling the others in his apartment parking lot, “I got to mate with two cars today!”)

    That and working on three different editing assignments over the course of the day, and some housework and such, made this a rather busy day. I’m ready for bed!

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  43. DJ, I think that was the most attention-getting photo, but they also have some cute ideas for toys, nap spaces, etc.

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