Prayer for the ongoing situation in Israel, whatever may or may not unfold in coming hours and days. (Sorry, mumsee, I broke the illusion of world/thread peace)
Well, I have a prayer request, but didn’t get here until now. Nightingale has had another big frustration with Boy, and is feeling hopeless about him growing up to be a responsible, decent adult. His father, and sometimes even the other grandparents (although I don’t think they think that whatever they give in to is harmful), go against her wishes, such as providing him with the equipment to play video games.
This morning, Nightingale expressed to me that she feels that her efforts to raise him right are all in vain, that nothing she does matters if the other parent works against her. I tried to encourage her that her efforts do matter, but she was not in the frame of mind to receive that.
Please pray for the whole situation, and everyone involved, especially for salvation for each one of them. In particular, I have prayed that in her distress over this latest thing, Nightingale would call out to God and be saved. And that Boy would indeed learn more from his mother and from me, and our examples, than he does from his father. The fruit may not show up for a while, but may it be growing in him nonetheless.
And I guess that I am included in the “everyone involved”.
Today has been a bit frustrating and and a little tense for me, because in her anger, Nightingale kind of banished Boy from upstairs, so he has been hanging out with me downstairs. He was gone for a couple hours for his visitation with his dad and grandparents, but with me for the rest of the time. And he is very talkative.
Praying over your family situation, Kizzie.🙏 Praying that as Nightingale feels pressed with no solution in sight that she might decide to try Jesus, to go to church and locate a youth group for Boy that he would so much find his place in that he would lose interest in video games and other less than desirable activities. May she find a community of belonging, too. For you, Kizzie, I pray that you can find new and fun ways to engage with Boy, maybe playing board games or jigsaw puzzles or putting together models or teaching him to cook, whatevef God has in mind as an adventure for you two to share to look forward to spending more time together without feeling dumped on. Oh, Lord, please bring a spirit of joy into Kizzie’s hoisehold, a spirit of peace and contentment, and most of all, salvation for the whole household. I pray in Jesus’ name, Amen
Any time you spend with him is so important, Kizzie. I know you enjoy your quiet life downstairs, but in a very short time, he will be gone for good. Savor what you have, basically depositing coins in his emotional bank.
A mom’s role is hard and Nightingale has struggled SO HARD to give her son what she knows he best needs.
Based on my personal experience, Moms always get the hard side of parenting. They need dads, yes, but even a father who disappoints is better than no father at all.
That means the parenting burden often falls on the mom.
Your job, of course, is to love and encourage both generations–another near-thankless job.
They both need to know someone loves them more than anyone else, and no matter what they say, do, or think.
Loving them, swallowing harsh words, is what both need.
The world they inhabit is full of harshness, criticism, hard work, and little encouragement.
They need a safe place to blow off the hurts without being further condemned.
That’s our job as both the mom and grandmother.
Knowing they can “bank” on your love and listening ear–no matter what ridiculous thing happens–and that you are always praying for them goes much farther than you can see today.
The love of God compels you–to commend who they are while NOT condoning or condemning their behavior, choice of words, or how they treat each other or the Boy’s dad.
They also need to both know you will not betray confidences either one shares with you–unless safety or illegal behavior is a factor.
Who else can Boy turn to, Kizzie? Who can love him enough to speak gentle truth to him? Who else can he take it from?
That’s particularly important as I’m sure he may be much larger than you now. You can speak truth to him because of 14 years of love you’ve bestowed on him.
That’s incredibly valuable.
Even while it can be exhausting for you.
I’ve got a blog post coming in the next few weeks about how Jesus never condemns, never condones, but always commends.
Michelle – All that you wrote is exactly what I strive to do.
As yesterday wore on and became evening, I would have loved for some time to relax before bed, but I knew that it was more important to be there for my grandson, and I let him stay with me for the rest of the evening.
He also spent a little time with me this morning.
(BTW, he is not yet 14, but will be in about six months.)
Wandering Views 
Praise that we have no prayer requests!
God continues to work out His plan and chooses to use us!
mumsee
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Prayer for the ongoing situation in Israel, whatever may or may not unfold in coming hours and days. (Sorry, mumsee, I broke the illusion of world/thread peace)
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No problem, with you in that prayer.
mumsee
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Well, I have a prayer request, but didn’t get here until now. Nightingale has had another big frustration with Boy, and is feeling hopeless about him growing up to be a responsible, decent adult. His father, and sometimes even the other grandparents (although I don’t think they think that whatever they give in to is harmful), go against her wishes, such as providing him with the equipment to play video games.
This morning, Nightingale expressed to me that she feels that her efforts to raise him right are all in vain, that nothing she does matters if the other parent works against her. I tried to encourage her that her efforts do matter, but she was not in the frame of mind to receive that.
Please pray for the whole situation, and everyone involved, especially for salvation for each one of them. In particular, I have prayed that in her distress over this latest thing, Nightingale would call out to God and be saved. And that Boy would indeed learn more from his mother and from me, and our examples, than he does from his father. The fruit may not show up for a while, but may it be growing in him nonetheless.
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And I guess that I am included in the “everyone involved”.
Today has been a bit frustrating and and a little tense for me, because in her anger, Nightingale kind of banished Boy from upstairs, so he has been hanging out with me downstairs. He was gone for a couple hours for his visitation with his dad and grandparents, but with me for the rest of the time. And he is very talkative.
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Praying alongside.
mumsee
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Praying over your family situation, Kizzie.🙏 Praying that as Nightingale feels pressed with no solution in sight that she might decide to try Jesus, to go to church and locate a youth group for Boy that he would so much find his place in that he would lose interest in video games and other less than desirable activities. May she find a community of belonging, too. For you, Kizzie, I pray that you can find new and fun ways to engage with Boy, maybe playing board games or jigsaw puzzles or putting together models or teaching him to cook, whatevef God has in mind as an adventure for you two to share to look forward to spending more time together without feeling dumped on. Oh, Lord, please bring a spirit of joy into Kizzie’s hoisehold, a spirit of peace and contentment, and most of all, salvation for the whole household. I pray in Jesus’ name, Amen
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Amen, Janice.
mumsee
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Any time you spend with him is so important, Kizzie. I know you enjoy your quiet life downstairs, but in a very short time, he will be gone for good. Savor what you have, basically depositing coins in his emotional bank.
A mom’s role is hard and Nightingale has struggled SO HARD to give her son what she knows he best needs.
Based on my personal experience, Moms always get the hard side of parenting. They need dads, yes, but even a father who disappoints is better than no father at all.
That means the parenting burden often falls on the mom.
Your job, of course, is to love and encourage both generations–another near-thankless job.
They both need to know someone loves them more than anyone else, and no matter what they say, do, or think.
Loving them, swallowing harsh words, is what both need.
The world they inhabit is full of harshness, criticism, hard work, and little encouragement.
They need a safe place to blow off the hurts without being further condemned.
That’s our job as both the mom and grandmother.
Knowing they can “bank” on your love and listening ear–no matter what ridiculous thing happens–and that you are always praying for them goes much farther than you can see today.
The love of God compels you–to commend who they are while NOT condoning or condemning their behavior, choice of words, or how they treat each other or the Boy’s dad.
They also need to both know you will not betray confidences either one shares with you–unless safety or illegal behavior is a factor.
Who else can Boy turn to, Kizzie? Who can love him enough to speak gentle truth to him? Who else can he take it from?
That’s particularly important as I’m sure he may be much larger than you now. You can speak truth to him because of 14 years of love you’ve bestowed on him.
That’s incredibly valuable.
Even while it can be exhausting for you.
I’ve got a blog post coming in the next few weeks about how Jesus never condemns, never condones, but always commends.
I’ll post it when it runs–probably on April 30.
xoxoxox
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Michelle – All that you wrote is exactly what I strive to do.
As yesterday wore on and became evening, I would have loved for some time to relax before bed, but I knew that it was more important to be there for my grandson, and I let him stay with me for the rest of the evening.
He also spent a little time with me this morning.
(BTW, he is not yet 14, but will be in about six months.)
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And Nightingale thanked me for letting him hang out with me, as she felt that she was too angry to deal with him.
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But Heidi is 14! 😀
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